Put your car keys beside your bed at night

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What to take to bed with you – not a joke Pretty neat idea. Never thought of it before. Put your car keys beside your bed at night Tell your spouse, your children, your neighbors, your parents, your Dr’s office, the check-out girl at the market, everyone you run across Put your car keys beside [...]

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Therapy

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To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity 1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down. 2.Page tourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice! 3.Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that. 4.Put decaf in the coffee [...]

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Thankful for

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I AM THANKFUL: FOR THE WIFE WHO SAYS IT’S HOT DOGS TONIGHT, BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME, AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE. FOR THE HUSBAND WHO IS ON THE SOFA BEING A COUCH POTATO, BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS. FOR THE TEENAGER WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT [...]

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Holy Prostitutes

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A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye….It reads: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 10 MILES He thinks this is a figment of his imagination and drives on without second thought…. Soon he sees another sign which reads: SISTERS [...]

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Are people waiting outside your car?

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The following is an email I received from a friend recently… Warning..!!!! Warning….!!!! Just last weekend on Friday night we parked in a public parking area. As we drove away I noticed a sticker on the rear window of the car. When I took it off after I got home, it was a receipt for [...]

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School in 1959 compared to 2009

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Math   1957  – 2009 (in  the USA ) Last week I purchased a burger at Burger King for $1.58. The counter girl took my $2 and I was digging for my change when I pulled 8 cents from my pocket and gave it to her. She stood there, holding  the nickel and 3 pennies, while [...]

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