Thoughts For The Day

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

Thoughts For The Day I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it. Sometimes too much to drink isn’t enough. Kinky is using a feather. Perverted is using the whole chicken. Heaven is Where: The Police are British, The Chefs are Italian, The Mechanics are German, The Lovers are French and It’s all organized [...]

Continue reading » No comments

Are you under 30

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

THE SPOILED UNDER-30 CROWD!!! If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!! When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were. When they were growing up; what with walking Twenty-five miles to school every morning…. Uphill…. barefoot… BOTH ways Yadda, yadda, yadda… [...]

Continue reading » No comments

Smoking in the rain

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Jane and Mary are outside their nursing home, having a drink and a smoke, when it starts to rain. Jane pulls out a condom, cuts off the end, puts it over her cigarette, and continues smoking. Mary: What in the hell is that? Jane: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn’t get wet. Mary: Where [...]

Continue reading » No comments

Pope and Tiger

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

The Pope and Tiger Woods die on the same day and because of an administrative mix up the Pope went to hell and Tiger Woods went to heaven. The Pope explains the situation to the administrative clerk in hell, who, after checking the paperwork admits that there is an error. “However”, the clerk explains, “it [...]

Continue reading » No comments

Dr. Suess books for the older kids

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Dr. Suess books for the older kids “MY FOOT IN YOUR ASS” Dr. Seuss’s Wacky Book of Ass Whoopin’s ” I Would Drink BEER, with a Goat on a Boat, in a Box with my Socks, in a Car at a Bar. I do, I do, I do like BEER!!” SLAMMED I AM “HORTON HIRES [...]

Continue reading » No comments

It’s Hell to be Old

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

OLD people have problems that you haven’t even considered yet! An 85-year-old man was requested by his doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, ‘Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.’ The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared [...]

Continue reading » No comments

Heck

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

George Bush, Queen Elizabeth, and Vladimir Putin all die and go to hell. While there, they spy a red phone and ask what the phone is for. The devil tells them it is for calling back to Earth. Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes. When he is finished the devil informs [...]

Continue reading » No comments

Call from Hell

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

George Bush, Queen Elizabeth, and Vladimir Putin all die and go to hell. While there, they spy a red phone and ask what the phone is for. The devil tells them it is for calling back to Earth. Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes. When he is finished the devil informs [...]

Continue reading » No comments

Life Among The Fires

Tags: , , , , , ,
Life Among The Fires

In the village Bokapahari, in India, thousands of people live in hell of permanent coal fires, earning about two dollars a day on sale of coal, which they stole from the state mines. The government has spent millions of dollars to build new apartments for them, but so far that people are in no hurry [...]

Continue reading » No comments

The Darvaza well

Tags: ,
The Darvaza well

Its not the work of nature , but due to unfortunate soviet mining in 1950 its famous with the name of HELL’S DOOR. Sphere: Related Content

Continue reading » No comments

Best Excuse For Speeding

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

A fellow bought a new Mercedes and was out on an interstate road for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through his hair and he decided to open her up. As the needle jumped up to 80mph he suddenly saw a flashing red and blue light behind him. ”They’ll [...]

Continue reading » No comments

OLD FART FOOTBALL

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, ‘Seven Points.’ His wife rolls over and says, ‘What in the world was that?’ The old man replied, ‘its fart football.’ A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says ‘Touchdown, tie score…’ After about five [...]

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Continue reading » No comments