NEVER ASSUME THAT MEN UNDERSTAND

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A woman was in a coma. She had been in it for months. Nurses were in her room giving her a bed bath. one of them was washing her private area and noticed that there was a slight response on the monitor whenever she touched her there. They tried it again and sure enough, there [...]

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Bees

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A man was driving down the road and ran out of gas. Just at that moment, a bee flew in his window. The bee said, ‘What seems to be the problem?’ ‘I’m out of gas,’ the man replied. The bee told the man to wait right there and flew away. Minutes later, the man watched [...]

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These really work

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AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES: 1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP. 2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK. 3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING [...]

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Leroy Has a Hearing Problem

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Leroy Has a Hearing Problem

Hearing Problem…. A True Story from North Carolina At the Saturday night tent revival the preacher announces, “Anyone with ‘needs’ to be prayed over, come forward to the front at the altar.” Leroy gets in line, and when it’s his turn, the preacher asks: “Leroy, what do you want me to pray about for you?” [...]

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(Funny Joke) The KGB assassin

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The KGB had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists — two men and one woman. For the final test, the KGB agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. “We must know that [...]

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3 Blondes

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A policeman was interrogating 3 blondes who were training to become detectives. To test their skills in recognizing a suspect, he shows the first blonde a picture for 5 seconds and then hides it. “This is your suspect, how would you recognize him? The first blonde answers, “That’s easy, we’ll catch him fast because he [...]

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Testicle Therapy

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Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony. The woman [...]

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OLD FART FOOTBALL

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An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, ‘Seven Points.’ His wife rolls over and says, ‘What in the world was that?’ The old man replied, ‘its fart football.’ A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says ‘Touchdown, tie score…’ After about five [...]

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Tips to Reduce Fuel Consumption & Increase Efficiency

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Tips to Reduce Fuel Consumption & Increase Efficiency

Here are some very good tips on improving your vehicle’s Fuel Economy / Increase Fuel Efficiency / Mileage. With increasing fuel prices it is becoming more and more prudent to use them. Use your gears wisely Driving in the highest gear possible without labouring the engine is a fuel-efficient way of driving. A vehicle travelling [...]

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The purpose of a dog!

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A  Dog’s Purpose? (from  a 6-year-old). Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolfhound named Belker. The dog’s owners, Ron, his wife Lisa, and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle. I examined Belker and found he was dying of [...]

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Ears …. This is a good one!

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A young man moved out from home and into a new apartment, all of his own, he went proudly down to the lobby to put his name on his mailbox. While there, an stunning young lady came out of the apartment next to the mailboxes, wearing only a robe. The boy smiled at the young woman [...]

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Life in the Country

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A Montana rancher got in his pickup and drove to a neighboring ranch and knocked at the door. A young boy, about 9, opened the door “Is your Dad home?” the rancher asked. “No sir, he isn’t,” the boy replied. “He went into town.” “Well,” said the rancher, “Is your Mother here?” “No sir, she’s [...]

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