1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
“If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”
2. My mother taught me RELIGION .
“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going [...]
04
Jan
2010
My Mother Taught Me…
Tags: anticipation, behavior modification, carpet, circle of life, clean underwear, dirt, envy, foresight, fortunate children, hypocrisy, irony, logic, medical science, million times, spinach, stamina, swing, time travel, tornado, Weather
26
Nov
2009
Twas the Night of Thanksgiving
Tags: anticipation, buttered potatoes, carrots, counting sheep, cranberries, dark meat, fridge, gravy, handful, happy thanksgiving, infatuation, leftovers, mouthful, pickles, pies, pumpkin pie, snack, thanksgiving dinner, thighs, yams
TWAS THE NIGHT OF THANKSGIVING,
BUT I JUST COULDN’T SLEEP.
I TRIED COUNTING BACKWARDS,
I TRIED COUNTING SHEEP.
THE LEFTOVERS BECKONED -
THE DARK MEAT AND WHITE,
BUT I FOUGHT THE TEMPTATION
WITH ALL OF MY MIGHT.
TOSSING AND TURNING WITH ANTICIPATION,
THE THOUGHT OF A SNACK BECAME INFATUATION.
SO, I RACED TO THE KITCHEN, FLUNG OPEN THE DOOR,
AND GAZED AT THE FRIDGE, FULL OF [...]