Laws of life


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1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you’ll have to potty.

2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

3.
Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

4.
Law of Random Numbers – If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.

5
Law of the Alibi If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

6.
Variation Law – I f you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

7
Law of the BathWhen the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.


8. Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don’t want to be seen with.

9.
Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won’t work, it will.

10.
Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

11.
Law of the Theater - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

12.
The Starbucks Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

13.
Murphy’s Law of Lockers - If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

14.
Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

15.
Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible if you don’t know what you are talking about.

16
Brown’s Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they’re ugly.

17.
Oliver’s Law of Public Speaking - A closed mouth gathers no feet.

18.
Wilson’s Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

19.
Doctors’ Law - If you don’t feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you’ll feel better. Don’t make an appointment and you’ll stay sick.
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Originally posted 2010-08-15 12:00:58. Republished by Blog Post Promoter




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